Sunday, January 08, 2006
So, alot has transpired since my last post. Brace yourself for a really long one(post i mean).
The cohesion day is just over. Which is good, because any longer and i might have committed a number of felonies . Before i descend into using acerbic tone. I'll tell you why i'm a little peeved about the whole event from my mildly bias perspective.
On returning from my attachment to that camp towards the north of taiwan. I had hoped that I could have just returned and set on preparing for the LRI. Which is coming up this Feb.
Of course way before I had headed for attachment, I had been asked if I would emcee the starting dinner. Something i had originally agreed to. So it's something i had come to expect I had to handle.
Little did I know that not two weeks upon my return (that's about new years time) That I would be Emcee-ing the whole event. Which no doubt is alittle bit of a supprise to me but nothing I couldn't handle. But let's throw in the rest of the variables into the equation, to show you what vexed me.
1. I was informed about 1.5weeks before the event.
2. The MTO that informed me to do it, did so before the weekend. Just before running off to Taipei for a weekend getaway leaving me and the other emcee to struggle with the details. ( To his credit he passed to me this years national day script to use as a frame to base my script around. Which didn't do me any good because it was mostly just a bunch of parade commands)
3. I was helping my team ic with the dinning hall plans as well as the seating arrangement and place cards(something that went through numerous changes). Something that I worked on till the day before the event.
4. My workshop 2IC wanted me to tag the aircon servicing men around. Something that required alot of time and very little brains. Something I did for a whole day, before T-loaning men from staff ho to do the job for me. Thanks mini me.
5. My own Boss had left me two vehicles to do while he was on leave.
6. The other emcee (Calvin) was going to Taipei for the new years, leaving me to tackle the script for the entire event. (On hindsight, this wasn't so bad because there were so many changes (15) the final script didn't even resemble the original).
7. The TO came into my bunk at 11pm to make changes the script the day before the event.
8. People kept telling me to change the script, but not giving examples of what they would like to be(more informal). So change the script i did, which didn't work because some other person would tell me again to change it (once again) to something even more informal. The QM saved the day by finally giving my much needed constructive criticism. Which is and I quote " Why don't you do a dialogue? " and so I did, which improved the situation.
I really wished that people would give constructive criticism AND tell me exactly what they want so i don't have to run about like a headless ( and very frustrated) chicken. This is something I've noticed my father does as evidenced by the sample conversation (replayed thousands of times in my life) that follows:
Dad: Jon pass me that thing.
Me(looking in the general direction his head is facing): what thing?
Dad (Applying his forced zen calm that lasts for a maximum of 9 nanoseconds): That thing over there.
Me(Circling my hand on a random object): This thing?
Dad: no over there.
Me(circling on another random object): Where? Here?
Dad: no no no, over there , look where my finger is pointing(which at times is his middle finger not in a vulgar manner just that he does.)
Me: Here? This thing here?
Dad:(Giving his totally unrelated axiom): Hiya no, nvm I'll get it myself. You know Jonathan there's always an easier way to do things you have to find that way to save you trouble....
Me:(Takes his frustration out on Chicken by letting snakey eat her)
(I will comment on this on a future blog along with introducing the characters of chicken, snakey and other soft toys that are in my life.)
9. Other things which I can't or choose not to remember.
Not that i blame the individuals or that I'm fishing for praise just that i find it cathar-tical to rant online.
The event to say the least (thanks to everyone else) was a success. I myself thought of my performance as beyond what i had expected. Not that the whole event was flawless. But a good portion of it went well. I did on occasion gobble up my words, eat up my partner emcee's lines and chew on my announcements(you can tell i haven't had my tea yet.) much to the annoyance of Calvin (whoops and sorry), but in terms of public speaking I think I've improved loads compared to SEC 4 when......
Mrs.S: Jonathan there's a rhetorical competition coming up and I want you to take part in it.
Me: Wow! You know what rhetorical means!
Mrs.S(slightly annoyed): The UN has declared this year the IYOP so that's your topic.
Me: Are you going to tell me IYOP means?
Mrs.S: No.
Me: So I've got to figure this out all by myself?
Mrs.S: Yes
Me: You are mean and evil.
Mrs.S: Yes. Have i also told you I have three children just to evade income tax?
Me: What does that have to do with the dialogue in this post?
Mrs.S: Nothing, it just fortifies your opinion of me as being evil. So, years from now you can post a highly bias and superfluous account of what really happened.
Me: Oh.
_____( Quick Flash lines of what happened that day till today)___
- Yawn, the sky is awfully bright
- Why do I have this sinking feeling?
-Argh!!!
- Come on bus what have I ever done to you! Nice bus, good bus come on now, come on.. Curse you Murphy!
- 30, 32, 33, which is faster? Which is faster? Think,think! Whoo Eclairs....
- Lord bless this uncle with great courage ignore passengers, great stupidity to forget what red lights mean and may the bus miraculously move at the super SBS speeds. May all the Katong covent and Tanjong katong people develop amoebic dysentery infections just for this morning.
- Where is everyone?
- Maybe if i just quietly slip in with my class I can just blen "Jonathan! what on earth are you doing on the floor get up on stage this instant!"
- "They hate the music that goes Boom boom boom?" What kind of a rhetorical is THAT?!?!
- Why are my knees shaking? So that's what the phrase means...
-"Next up from class 4E2 we have Jonathan Phan"
- Stop shaking, there's nothing to be nervous about just imagine your audience naked. That's right, imagine them naked.
- ARGH!!! BAD IDEA!BAD IDEA!!TMI!!Mrs.S is a JuDGE!?!?!
- Focus on the cards, focus on the cards.
- Remember the older generation that came before us, that bore on their backs the Singaporean dream, who built this nation to what is it today with their blood, sweat and tears so that you wouldn't have to.
- Okay it's over now, it's all over now breathe breathe.
- ALL THAT FOR A BOX OF FLOPPY DISKS!!!!
- THE BOOM BOOM GIRL beat me!?!?!!
____
- TRASHBAG MAN!!!
- I'll never speak in public till the day I die.
____
- Ah okay lah Sir just gimme the info I'll do a draft for you by Monday.
So now that you can see what happend to me in SEC 4 I think i did very well considering that COMMANDER STARLIGHT was there and I didn't go into hysteria, I take it i did pretty well.
That and a number of people that came up to me and said I did an excellent job and even (and I quote) saying to the Emcees " You all did really well, this shouldn't be called cohesion day it should be called Emcee day, power, good job guys."
Not to toot my own horn of course.
I've got another post to type on out on my recent trip to Kao Hsiung. Expect it soon.
So Jonathan's Gem for today (Yes I know I didn't include it in my last post):
When speaking to the public DO NOT imagine your audience to be naked to calm yourself (ESPECIALLY if you are in the army).
You WILL live to regret it.
Instead (This is being constructive) rehearse loads, have a partner on stage with you and focus on how everyone is too busy thinking about everything in relation to themselves and don't give two shakes of a bunny's butt about what you have to say.
I've also heard that a little alcohol can help.
I said a LITTLE.
That is all
Jon.P
Cheers
The cohesion day is just over. Which is good, because any longer and i might have committed a number of felonies . Before i descend into using acerbic tone. I'll tell you why i'm a little peeved about the whole event from my mildly bias perspective.
On returning from my attachment to that camp towards the north of taiwan. I had hoped that I could have just returned and set on preparing for the LRI. Which is coming up this Feb.
Of course way before I had headed for attachment, I had been asked if I would emcee the starting dinner. Something i had originally agreed to. So it's something i had come to expect I had to handle.
Little did I know that not two weeks upon my return (that's about new years time) That I would be Emcee-ing the whole event. Which no doubt is alittle bit of a supprise to me but nothing I couldn't handle. But let's throw in the rest of the variables into the equation, to show you what vexed me.
1. I was informed about 1.5weeks before the event.
2. The MTO that informed me to do it, did so before the weekend. Just before running off to Taipei for a weekend getaway leaving me and the other emcee to struggle with the details. ( To his credit he passed to me this years national day script to use as a frame to base my script around. Which didn't do me any good because it was mostly just a bunch of parade commands)
3. I was helping my team ic with the dinning hall plans as well as the seating arrangement and place cards(something that went through numerous changes). Something that I worked on till the day before the event.
4. My workshop 2IC wanted me to tag the aircon servicing men around. Something that required alot of time and very little brains. Something I did for a whole day, before T-loaning men from staff ho to do the job for me. Thanks mini me.
5. My own Boss had left me two vehicles to do while he was on leave.
6. The other emcee (Calvin) was going to Taipei for the new years, leaving me to tackle the script for the entire event. (On hindsight, this wasn't so bad because there were so many changes (15) the final script didn't even resemble the original).
7. The TO came into my bunk at 11pm to make changes the script the day before the event.
8. People kept telling me to change the script, but not giving examples of what they would like to be(more informal). So change the script i did, which didn't work because some other person would tell me again to change it (once again) to something even more informal. The QM saved the day by finally giving my much needed constructive criticism. Which is and I quote " Why don't you do a dialogue? " and so I did, which improved the situation.
I really wished that people would give constructive criticism AND tell me exactly what they want so i don't have to run about like a headless ( and very frustrated) chicken. This is something I've noticed my father does as evidenced by the sample conversation (replayed thousands of times in my life) that follows:
Dad: Jon pass me that thing.
Me(looking in the general direction his head is facing): what thing?
Dad (Applying his forced zen calm that lasts for a maximum of 9 nanoseconds): That thing over there.
Me(Circling my hand on a random object): This thing?
Dad: no over there.
Me(circling on another random object): Where? Here?
Dad: no no no, over there , look where my finger is pointing(which at times is his middle finger not in a vulgar manner just that he does.)
Me: Here? This thing here?
Dad:(Giving his totally unrelated axiom): Hiya no, nvm I'll get it myself. You know Jonathan there's always an easier way to do things you have to find that way to save you trouble....
Me:(Takes his frustration out on Chicken by letting snakey eat her)
(I will comment on this on a future blog along with introducing the characters of chicken, snakey and other soft toys that are in my life.)
9. Other things which I can't or choose not to remember.
Not that i blame the individuals or that I'm fishing for praise just that i find it cathar-tical to rant online.
The event to say the least (thanks to everyone else) was a success. I myself thought of my performance as beyond what i had expected. Not that the whole event was flawless. But a good portion of it went well. I did on occasion gobble up my words, eat up my partner emcee's lines and chew on my announcements(you can tell i haven't had my tea yet.) much to the annoyance of Calvin (whoops and sorry), but in terms of public speaking I think I've improved loads compared to SEC 4 when......
Mrs.S: Jonathan there's a rhetorical competition coming up and I want you to take part in it.
Me: Wow! You know what rhetorical means!
Mrs.S(slightly annoyed): The UN has declared this year the IYOP so that's your topic.
Me: Are you going to tell me IYOP means?
Mrs.S: No.
Me: So I've got to figure this out all by myself?
Mrs.S: Yes
Me: You are mean and evil.
Mrs.S: Yes. Have i also told you I have three children just to evade income tax?
Me: What does that have to do with the dialogue in this post?
Mrs.S: Nothing, it just fortifies your opinion of me as being evil. So, years from now you can post a highly bias and superfluous account of what really happened.
Me: Oh.
_____( Quick Flash lines of what happened that day till today)___
- Yawn, the sky is awfully bright
- Why do I have this sinking feeling?
-Argh!!!
- Come on bus what have I ever done to you! Nice bus, good bus come on now, come on.. Curse you Murphy!
- 30, 32, 33, which is faster? Which is faster? Think,think! Whoo Eclairs....
- Lord bless this uncle with great courage ignore passengers, great stupidity to forget what red lights mean and may the bus miraculously move at the super SBS speeds. May all the Katong covent and Tanjong katong people develop amoebic dysentery infections just for this morning.
- Where is everyone?
- Maybe if i just quietly slip in with my class I can just blen "Jonathan! what on earth are you doing on the floor get up on stage this instant!"
- "They hate the music that goes Boom boom boom?" What kind of a rhetorical is THAT?!?!
- Why are my knees shaking? So that's what the phrase means...
-"Next up from class 4E2 we have Jonathan Phan"
- Stop shaking, there's nothing to be nervous about just imagine your audience naked. That's right, imagine them naked.
- ARGH!!! BAD IDEA!BAD IDEA!!TMI!!Mrs.S is a JuDGE!?!?!
- Focus on the cards, focus on the cards.
- Remember the older generation that came before us, that bore on their backs the Singaporean dream, who built this nation to what is it today with their blood, sweat and tears so that you wouldn't have to.
- Okay it's over now, it's all over now breathe breathe.
- ALL THAT FOR A BOX OF FLOPPY DISKS!!!!
- THE BOOM BOOM GIRL beat me!?!?!!
____
- TRASHBAG MAN!!!
- I'll never speak in public till the day I die.
____
- Ah okay lah Sir just gimme the info I'll do a draft for you by Monday.
So now that you can see what happend to me in SEC 4 I think i did very well considering that COMMANDER STARLIGHT was there and I didn't go into hysteria, I take it i did pretty well.
That and a number of people that came up to me and said I did an excellent job and even (and I quote) saying to the Emcees " You all did really well, this shouldn't be called cohesion day it should be called Emcee day, power, good job guys."
Not to toot my own horn of course.
I've got another post to type on out on my recent trip to Kao Hsiung. Expect it soon.
So Jonathan's Gem for today (Yes I know I didn't include it in my last post):
When speaking to the public DO NOT imagine your audience to be naked to calm yourself (ESPECIALLY if you are in the army).
You WILL live to regret it.
Instead (This is being constructive) rehearse loads, have a partner on stage with you and focus on how everyone is too busy thinking about everything in relation to themselves and don't give two shakes of a bunny's butt about what you have to say.
I've also heard that a little alcohol can help.
I said a LITTLE.
That is all
Jon.P
Cheers
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